I Would Understand

Late nights, and such.
Chronic Insomniac.
So Haiiiii all, My name is Brenna, you can call me Beans, but I think I lost her.
She used to like to learn and rock, she still does, but the nights jumble all my thoughts, don't they do the same to you? I've decided I want a real relationship now. I miss it. I want someone to sleep next to. Someone who really means something to me and vice versa. Enough of this stupid shit. Of being in the HMM HMM HMM mode. I want it. I miss it. I need it. Loneliness rocks my life.
Can't wait to see people tmrw. Or today I guess. Wish I could sleep till then. But my body doesn't want to sleep right now. It wants to eat nachos. And get stoned. So it goes.
I've lost the joy in watching my movies. I really wish I had one I wanted to watch right now, a movie would be perfect for my mind. But my mind doesn't want to slow down. It wants to keep going, rocking and rolling and spinning and twisting. Hence the need for marijuana. Well, not need. Just want. Or something to fuck up this running brain.
I desperately want an apartment. Cuz at least then I'd have roommates to snug with. I wouldn't feel so alone. And I could make fucking nachos without being afraid to awaken my mother and her wrath.
I would also like a job. At Subway. I really liked that job. Maybe I'll get an apartment in St Annes and they'll hire me at that Subsssss. I would also like to be a pro writer.
I feel very suave writer esque right now, sitting in a black lace bra and a high waisted black american apparel cotton skirt. My sex hair in a blob on my head. Typing vivaciously on my laptop, cross-legged whilst listening to Third Eye Blind and Rise Against.
I also want more tea. But that will wake me up more. Fuck that. I'm a martyr. Or an avid complainer. When I wanna be.
So apparently Im going on a walk. Love it.

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